You know those times when your mom becomes extremely irritable for no apparent reason? When your girlfriend blows you off due to migraines and headaches? When your wife turns into a total bitch for a week every month? That’s PMS for you… But now you can get even by playing this very unusual upcoming game.
PMS Survivor is a first-person shooter under development for PC, PS3 and Xbox 360, described to us with the following tagline: “In a world of crazed females, can you survive the PMS rage? Survive an epic journey from pre-menstrual to post-apocalyptic!”
Sounds interesting to me, especially the post-apocalyptic part! Who would have guessed menstrual cycles could bring about the end of the world? Well, maybe judging by my mood swings, that’s not that hard to believe… I’m one of the happiest, most smiley persons you’ll know until that time of the month. But moving on.
PMS Survivor places you in Riverton, once a pleasant place to visit, now turned into a ghost town inhabited only by crazed women. As the story goes, the local corporate industry WELI Pharmaceuticals develops a new medication that is stated to be the “cure” for all menstrual symptoms. But as it turns out, the drug wasn’t thoroughly tested, and soon enough, every woman in town begins experiencing side effects. Eventually, all who took Cramp-B-Gone become stuck in a perpetual rage stasis.
You are a special ops agent sent by the CIA (the Center for Injection of the Antidote) to end the chaos and return the town to its former self. Armed with tampon guns and maxi-pad grenades (I kid you not) you will brave the seemingly deserted streets of Riverton in search of possible survivors. You will face all kinds of enemies: crazed karate class students, deranged soccer moms, furious yoga instructors, all of them out to destroy whoever and whatever crosses their path.
The most notable feature in the game is the calendar system, which will indicate during what days of the month your female enemies become more powerful. During these days, the hunter becomes the hunted and you must rely exclusively on stealth techniques in order to survive.
For the most part, PMS Survivor could be any other FPS… except for its theme. Personally, I find it hilarious and can’t wait to try it out. After all, if I survive my own three-headed PMS monster every month – without causing husband damage – I’m sure I can survive Riverton too.
PMS Survivor is still looking for a publisher, so there is no tentative release date yet.
Features at a glance (the fact sheet was so bizarre that we just had to share):
Title: PMS Survivor
Genre: FPS
Platforms: PC/PS3/X360
- Fully customizable character: become the virtual person you have always wanted to be in real life.
- It’s a bloody mess out there! Use your tampon gun and maxi-pad grenades to keep enemies at bay!
- Annihilate those mood swings with the hormone ray gun!
- Keep an eye on your calendar, enemies will become more powerful during certain days of the month!
- Future DLC plans: Cramps of War and Left 4 Red expansions, other smaller DLC scheduled to release every 28 days.
PMS Survivor is sponsored by Cramp-B-Gone®. Cramp-B-Gone®, for relief of the toughest menstrual symptoms! Pre-order your copy and receive $20 in coupons plus a code to download a special in-game item!
Cramp-B-Gone® is a registered trademark of WELI Pharma (WELI Pharmaceuticals L.L.C.).
Cramp-B-Gone® is not recommended for everyone. Continuous use may cause side effects. Talk to your doctor if you experience dizziness, drowsiness, fainting, aggressiveness, hypersensitive nipples, vision loss, explosive diarrhea, extreme mood swings, spontaneous combustion and/or ruptured testicles.
Editor’s note:
PMS Survivor was an April’s Fools joke, written only with the purpose to entertain. We hope you had a laugh or two over this wacky concept! 🙂